Last year, after one of this area\u2019s odd and paralyzing snowstorms, I watched a very dumb guy in a very fancy SUV suddenly whip around the traffic in front of him and barrel at breakneck speed up an icy hill. The icy hill came out the victor, as icy hills are known to do.<\/p>\n
Within seconds, the full-size 4×4, with its control-track, all-wheel drive system, power-adjustable pedals and ABS power brakes was lying nose-down in a 3-foot ditch of snow. The driver climbed out, red-faced and surly, shouting words not often heard in even the most impious R-rated film.<\/p>\n
But adding to the piquancy of the moment was the sight of the vehicle\u2019s rear end sticking out into the road. It made it easy to read the bumper sticker on the right rear fender: \u201cMy Kid\u2019s An Honor Student!\u201d So maybe the kid was adopted.<\/p>\n
When I was in grade school, nobody had yet invented the idea of designing children-praising bumper stickers. If they had, my parents might have slapped stickers on their bumper reading such things as \u201cMy Kid\u2019s Got Great Posture!\u201d \u201cSometimes My Kid Packs His Own Lunch!\u201d \u201cMy Kid\u2019s Report Card Wasn\u2019t Great But It Was Sure Better Than The One The Morgan\u2019s Kid Got.\u201d (That one would actually be too long for the rear \u2013 and would be continued on the front bumper.)<\/p>\n
One of the guys who graduated the eighth grade with me, Lonnie Ferguson, would have qualified for this one: \u201cMy Kid Is The First One In His Class To Shave.\u201d Of course, that would only have been true if you didn\u2019t count Carla Robinson.<\/p>\n
The point is that parents who truly have bright kids should be justifiably proud. After all, a splendid acorn reflects nicely on the originating oak tree.<\/p>\n
A few years ago, you may recall, a woman in Denver admitted that she faked the records of her 6-year old boy\u2019s IQ test \u2013 one that recorded his score at 298, the highest ever. To give you an idea of how exaggerated that score was, take the actual I.Q. of a former child prodigy from Korea named Kim Ung Yong. His IQ was recorded at 210, making him smart as a whip. No accurate record of a whip\u2019s I.Q. has actually been documented, however.<\/p>\n
Much has been made recently of Barack Obama\u2019s intelligence, with his IQ estimated to be between 130 and 148. That\u2019s not bad, especially when compared with the reported IQs of former presidents such as Millard Fillmore (104) and Andrew Johnson (90).<\/p>\n
John Quincy Adams might have been the brightest president. He was estimated to have clocked in at 175. Leonardo Da Vinci is believed to have had an IQ of 220, while Sir Isaac Newton was a comparative dullard at a mere 190.<\/p>\n
And 160 isn\u2019t a bad number. It\u2019s the reputed IQ for Bill Gates, Paul Allen, Ben Franklin, Stephen Hawking and Thomas Jefferson. Oh, and also a guy named Einstein. Yeah, THAT Einstein.<\/p>\n
A few years ago, I began to wonder about my own IQ score. I realized that I didn\u2019t even know what it was. I remembered taking some test in school, but I never learned the results. It worried me, because if I was smart, why had I never wondered about my IQ score before?<\/p>\n
I got on the phone and called my mom.<\/p>\n
Me: \u201cMom, when I was a kid, did you ever receive any information about my IQ score?\u201d<\/p>\n
Mom: \u201cI don\u2019t recall exactly. But if it was really high, I would have remembered.\u201d<\/p>\n
Me: \u201cDo you think you might have it some of your old papers there at the house?\u201d<\/p>\n
Mom: \u201cMaybe. But let me tell you something, Mike.\u201d<\/p>\n
Me: \u201cPat.\u201d<\/p>\n
Mom: \u201cRight. Pat. Let me tell you something. Your IQ score never mattered to me. And whether it was high or low, I would not have loved you less.\u201d<\/p>\n
Me: \u201cThanks, Mom. But do you have the actual score lying around anywhere?\u201d<\/p>\n
Mom: \u201cLet me look. I\u2019ll call you back.\u201d<\/p>\n
An hour later, she called.<\/p>\n
Mom: \u201cI found it. And it\u2019s signed by your teacher, Mr. Anderson.\u201d<\/p>\n
Me: \u201cGreat! What\u2019s the score?\u201d<\/p>\n
Mom: \u201cMr. Anderson verified it was 135.\u201d<\/p>\n
Me: \u201cReally? That\u2019s great, mom. Thanks.\u201d<\/p>\n
I hung up feeling pretty darn good. Then I remembered. Mr. Anderson was my bowling instructor.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
Pat Cashman is a writer, actor and public speaker. He can be reached at pat@patcashman.com<\/p><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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