Multiple media sources last week reported Issaquah High School students once again hosting May Madness, an online tournament where male students vote for the sexiest female student.
As a former high school student in that district, initially I wanted to post something sarcastic about our rival school. But as I continued to think about the issue, one alarming thing kept moving to the forefront of my mind: where was the indignant uproar from the female students demanding respect from their male counterparts?
Where were the protest signs saying, “I am more than my looks”?
Ladies, where was your self-respect?
Maybe if they had known what this kind of behavior can lead to they would have spoken up. Maybe if they had peeled back the layers and analyzed the situation, these ladies could have seen how inherently wrong this competition is and say something. Maybe if someone had explained how dangerous things like this can get, they would have rallied or written a petition.
Something. Anything.
But they said nothing – not an angry word spoken in protest.
Well, let me tell you exactly what silence means in our society.
A 16-year-old girl was at a party in Steubenville, Ohio. She got drunk. She blacked out. She was sexually assaulted. A clear case of rape, right? Wrong.
The defense attorney for one of the defendants argued that because “she didn’t affirmatively say no,” this young lady consented to having sexual relations with the young men on trial.
Growing up, I was taught that yes means yes, and no means no. No does not mean yes or keep going — silence does not mean maybe or yes either. So when did the definitions change? Probably about the same time that young people stopped voicing their opinions about important societal issues.
In the case of the 23-year-old woman in India who was sexually assaulted with a metal rod and brutally gang raped to death late last year, she didn’t even have the choice to say yes or no. She was silenced and stripped of her right to say no.
Are we to interpret her silence as consent as well?
So maybe you can see now why it doesn’t make sense to me that these young ladies in Issaquah would take that right away from themselves – why they wouldn’t choose to use their voices and make a statement.
In the courtroom, they are arguing for your silence to be taken as a yes, consenting and condoning all behavior done to you. So why, when there are so many platforms nowadays from which to raise your voices against sexism and exploitation, why would you choose silence, consenting to young men judging you based on looks and condoning all behavior done to you?
Not only do we need to teach our young men that silence does not mean yes, we should simultaneously stress the importance of speaking up against issues like this to our young female generation. Because the only way to combat silence is with noise – lots of noise – enough noise to make changes to our disappointing society.
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